Wednesday, 9 August 2017

Inner Monologue of a Writer on a Hiatus



I did it again.

I took a blogging hiatus.

I can't write anymore. Words that were typed seamlessly, now struggle to leave my mind.

I stare at my computer screen for hours, my mind brimming with unstructured thoughts and then,

I type. I try to let out but I end up deleting it all.

No, it's not a writers block.

  • I have hundreds of stories to narrate to you, countless lessons that I have learned to share with you.

No, it's not the lack of time.

  • For what I believe, people make time for something that is important to them.

What is it then, Sakshi?

I ask this question to myself repeatedly. I don't know if those are valid reasons or just lies that I tell myself to convince my naive heart.

"Ah! I can't be a technical person with a creative mind"
I would say, as my fingers moved swiftly across the keyboard while I code.

"There is a fine line between my life and what I share"
Forgetting how writing is to be vulnerable.

"I am not able to write how I used to"
You haven't been writing in a flow since months, almost years. It's going to take some time for you to get you in the groove. Do you remember your first blog post? I would have laughed it off, if I read it now. But, you got your first 3 followers that day. Are you going to give up even before you try?

"The blogging community is not what it used to be"
Now you're just finding reasons to not write.

Sakshi, no one is stopping you to write except yourself.

I miss writing.

Every day, it pains me like a goddamn needle prick in my heart knowing I'm losing an essential part of me.

..but here I'm today.

I have decided to believe in myself and start writing again.

I have decided to be a better writer than the day before.

I want to share my stories with you.

I want you to learn from my experiences.

I want to build us a community where we help one another despite the distances.

That was and has been the only reason of why I write and will continue to.

I hope I'm back.

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12 comments:

  1. I was waiting for this to come, your comeback. I am glad that you finally made it. I couldn't agree more on the fact that technical side of us is taking over our creativity but that's actually a perfect way of testing our resolve over things what we enjoy doing the most.

    Looking forward for another one!.

    And yes I do feel ditto to what you are feeling right now.

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    Replies
    1. I'm glad you liked my comeback post and that you could relate to it!
      Thank you so much :)

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  2. I go through times when I question my writing and my motivation to write. I questions sometimes where does it all lead? I took a hiatus from blogging and just came back in June. Since then I've been doing really well with staying focused and writing up a storm. Glad you're back:) #stayclassymama

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    Replies
    1. Sometimes a break is all you need to prioritise your life and get back on track. I hope you stay a long time now :)
      Glad to have you back as well!

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  3. Glad you're back - the need to write is something that never really goes away and without that outlet, it can be really frustrating
    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes :)
    Debbie

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  4. I hope you are back too and look forward to reading your stories and thoughts. Thank you for joining us at #StayClassymama

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  5. Hi! I've nominated you for the Blogger Recognition Award! Congratulations :) You can check out the post and rules for accepting here! http://forthesakeofgoodtaste.com/blogger-recognition-award/

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Capture some sunshine *winks*

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